Hi, Reader!

It’s 8:45 PM.

You’ve been in back-to-back meetings since 8:00 AM. You had a quick check-in over lunch, and then a client dinner after. You pull into the driveway and put the car in park.

The house is quiet.

You sit there for an extra minute. The engine is off, but your brain is still back at the restaurant table. You’re running through the dinner conversation. You need to touch base on a decision made over steaks.

You walk through the front door. You take your shoes off. Your wife is in the kitchen and asks how the dinner went.

You give a short answer.

You are physically standing in your kitchen. But mentally, you are still sitting at the restaurant table. The door closed behind you, but the day didn’t. It followed you in.

You walk past your daughter’s room. She’s reading. You wave, but you don’t go in. You tell yourself it’s because she’s busy, but the truth is you don’t have the bandwidth for a real conversation. The tank is empty. The boiler is running hot. You don’t know how to shut it off.

Present in the room. Somewhere else entirely.

The Gear

Here is what gets me. Look at John 13.

Jesus is about to have the most important dinner of his life. The stakes could not be higher. But before they sit down at the table, he gets down and washes the disciples’ feet.

I used to read that as a leadership lesson about humility. I don’t think that’s all it is.

He is washing the dust of the road off of them.

The dust from the travel. The dirt from the journey. He is drawing a physical boundary between the outside world and the table.

The road does not belong at the table.

We think we can push forward from a 12-hour day of high-stakes decisions straight into the living room and just flip a switch. We think we can walk through the door and instantly be the dad and the husband we want to be.

You can’t. The dust from the road is still on you. You have to wash it off before you sit down.

The Move

Here are the next steps I’m practicing:

• The Driveway Silence: Don’t get out of the car immediately. Take 60 seconds. Breathe. Shift contexts deliberately.
• The Drop Zone Dump: Keep a small notebook in the car. Jot down the open loops so you don’t carry them inside.
• The Re-Entry Statement: Say out loud, “I am home now. I am putting the day down.”

Let me know what you think.

The Systems Dad,

Christopher Lynn

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